Almost Okay

  For the past few months, I disappeared from my blog. It wasn’t planned. I didn’t wake up one day and decide to stop writing. Life simply became overwhelming, and I had to step away for a while. My family has been going through a very difficult situation recently. There have been financial struggles, emotional stress, and many uncomfortable conversations at home. Sometimes life reaches a point where everything feels too heavy to carry at once. During that time, I had what I can only describe as a mental breakdown. My mind felt exhausted, my emotions were everywhere, and even small things felt difficult to handle. When you’re in that state, things like blogging, productivity, or even simple routines stop feeling important. I needed space. So I stopped writing for a while. I stopped thinking about content, posts, or blogging plans. Instead, I tried to focus on my family and on taking things one day at a time. One thing I learned during this period is that it’s okay to pause. Sometim...

Trigger Warning: Emotional abuse, childhood trauma, family conflict This work can be difficult to read for people who have been emotionally neglected or had controlling parents. Be gentle with yourself when reading.  I've always felt like writing this—not for pity, but because sometimes the weight of not-saying anything feels too much to bear. Perhaps someone somewhere grew up like me, learning in silence that love could hurt and family could scar you deeper than strangers ever would.  My parents never struck me. But their words struck me. Their silences struck me. Their expectations cut so deep they left invisible wounds that still throb. 1. Love That Came With Fear When I was a kid, I believed all families were the same as mine—shouting arguments ringing in the walls, my mother sobbing in the kitchen, my dad bellowing from the hallway, and me standing there shaking, acting as if I wasn't present. They would call me in to their brawls, even when I was still a kid. I had to be...

If life handed out medals for “most use-and-throw friendships,” I’d probably have a whole shelf by now. Not the shiny kind you’d proudly display, but the cheap plastic ones they give in school sports day just to keep kids from crying. The sad truth? I’ve never really had what you’d call “real friends.” I don’t mean every single person was fake, but most of the people I thought were my friends didn’t exactly see me the same way. For them, I was just a classmate, a convenient homework helper, or someone to laugh at when they needed a new joke. And me? I was the fool who thought maybe it was my fault. Maybe I was too boring, too introverted, too obedient to my parents. Maybe if I were more outgoing, they’d actually include me. School Days: The First Disappointments In school, there was one person I thought of as my best friend. We were in the same class for nine whole years. I always looked out for them, cheered for them, shared everything I could. But it took me years to realize they nev...

  Trigger warning: This post discusses social anxiety, depression, workplace bullying, and quitting a job for mental health. Read with care. College Placements That Weren’t Placements I thought adulting meant a neat pay slip, a cup of office tea, and a reasonable number of passive-aggressive emails. Turns out adulting sometimes means staring at fluorescent lights while your stomach does interpretive dance. Post-college, I dove right into job searching — Naukri, Google, and those "freshers welcome" job ads that secretly require five years of experience. My college "placement" was a politic ease: one bank came, employed individuals from a particular category (they assured me they were even, and I laughed like it was business as usual). I cleared the tests, did the in-person, and the interviewer even complimented me — but the final roll call was like a drama I wasn't a part of. The Waiting Game: Freshers Need Experience? So I spent over a year looking. The ads dema...

    Trigger Alert: This post discusses social anxiety, cringe moments, and how it feels to be misunderstood. If overwhelming topics are too much for you, you can skip this one. Your comfort is important.💙❤️  What is Social Anxiety (in Plain Terms)? Social anxiety is not simply "shyness." It's a mental disorder in which social interactions — such as speaking with others, going to parties, or even making eye contact — become daunting and frightening. Picture your mind hitting the panic button every time someone utters "let's go out" or when a stranger attempts to strike up conversation. That's social anxiety. It has nothing to do with being lazy, antisocial, or rude. It has to do with having a storm within while appearing to be calm outside. My Journey to Realization It took me ages to realize that what I felt was something with a name. My parents, family, and friends had no idea what "social anxiety" even was. They believed that I w...

People think introverts are just quiet little creatures who love reading in corners.  Reality? We’re full-time chaos coordinators in our heads. Being an introvert is like having 100 open tabs in your brain while desperately trying to avoid human interaction. If you’ve ever pretended not to hear your phone ringing, or still feel embarrassed about that one weird thing you did in 7th grade, congrats: welcome to introvert life. Here’s a very scientific breakdown of the daily struggles of being an introvert (a.k.a. why we deserve medals for surviving the outside world). 1. The Great Escape  Bell rings at school or college? Extroverts: “Let’s hang out!” Introverts: already halfway home. We don’t walk home — we teleport. Nobody can match the speed of an introvert heading back to their room. The couch is calling, and we must answer. Well this is exactly my scenario. I don't know why though. Maybe this is why i still don't have friends...😢😭😭 2. Alone but Never Lonely  People: ...

 Being the eldest sibling in a household feels dignified on the surface: "the responsible one," "the strong one," "the role model." But let's be honest — in real life, it's more like you've been conned into an unpaid internship for life with your job title being: do everything, know everything, and don't ever complain. If you're a firstborn, then you already get it. If not, strap yourself in — because here's the ultimate survival manual to eldest child issues nobody mentions (but every firstborn is well aware of). 1. Born Mature Since day one, the older child position is accompanied by an unspoken maturity badge. Somehow, just because you were born first, you should just naturally be responsible, level-headed, and wise. What this actually means: You're assumed to know everything before you even have a chance to learn it. Mistakes aren't "cute" any longer; they're "irresponsible." If there's some...